Freelancer- The Holocaust - Freelancer Fan Fiction - Lancersreactor

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Killa

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1

Sunday, October 2nd 2005, 9:42am

Um, hello? Anyone...................... echo! Good, bad, needs improvement? I want some brutally honest opinions here!
Signature from »Killa« __________________________ Okay, since someone who will remain nameless was offended by my last sentence, I`ve changed it. For those of you who just can`t wait, I`ve finally started a new fanfic, The Holocaust! __________________________ 4 8 15 16 23 42 Twenty bucks to whoever can tell me what the deal is with those numbers. I`ll give you a hint: They have somthing to do with a guy named Hurley. (Congrats to Taw, he was the first to get it right.)

Wilde

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2

Sunday, October 2nd 2005, 9:45am

The scientist bit sounds somewhat overly typical. But other than that it´s good.
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Killa

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3

Sunday, October 2nd 2005, 10:11am

Eh, if I didn´t get it up last night then it would be three days before I would be able to post it. Besides, that was just a little teaser to draw you in.
Signature from »Killa« __________________________ Okay, since someone who will remain nameless was offended by my last sentence, I`ve changed it. For those of you who just can`t wait, I`ve finally started a new fanfic, The Holocaust! __________________________ 4 8 15 16 23 42 Twenty bucks to whoever can tell me what the deal is with those numbers. I`ll give you a hint: They have somthing to do with a guy named Hurley. (Congrats to Taw, he was the first to get it right.)

Killa

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4

Sunday, October 2nd 2005, 10:18am

Oh, and I just edited the last part of the teaser.
Signature from »Killa« __________________________ Okay, since someone who will remain nameless was offended by my last sentence, I`ve changed it. For those of you who just can`t wait, I`ve finally started a new fanfic, The Holocaust! __________________________ 4 8 15 16 23 42 Twenty bucks to whoever can tell me what the deal is with those numbers. I`ll give you a hint: They have somthing to do with a guy named Hurley. (Congrats to Taw, he was the first to get it right.)

Wilde

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5

Sunday, October 2nd 2005, 11:44am

Ah. Much better. The flow could be tweaked, but its much less cliched.
Signature from »Wilde« __)_*()_( my cat was trampled by a packaderm...

Killa

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6

Sunday, October 2nd 2005, 2:44pm

If I keep editing the last few sentences of the teaser then I won´t have any time to write the first chapter.
Signature from »Killa« __________________________ Okay, since someone who will remain nameless was offended by my last sentence, I`ve changed it. For those of you who just can`t wait, I`ve finally started a new fanfic, The Holocaust! __________________________ 4 8 15 16 23 42 Twenty bucks to whoever can tell me what the deal is with those numbers. I`ll give you a hint: They have somthing to do with a guy named Hurley. (Congrats to Taw, he was the first to get it right.)

ww2jacob

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7

Sunday, October 2nd 2005, 3:05pm

Whoa, wait a second. Are my eyes decieving me? Wilde is COMPLIMENTING a fanfic? THE WORLD IS COMING TO AN END!!! <img src=smilies/icon_smile_tongue.gif width=15 height=15 border=0 align=middle><img src=smilies/icon_smile_tongue.gif width=15 height=15 border=0 align=middle><img src=smilies/icon_smile_tongue.gif width=15 height=15 border=0 align=middle> Anyways, Killa, it´s very nice. <img src=smilies/icon_smile_big.gif width=15 height=15 border=0 align=middle>
Signature from »ww2jacob« ________________________________ A turbulent time where the fate of humankind rests in the balance. The fulcrum, the breaking point of humanity. Heros rise and fall, faster than any can track. Saviors and demons both. Who will you be? How will your story be told? Control Your Own Faction 5: The Redemption Join the revolution here!

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8

Sunday, October 2nd 2005, 3:41pm

Keep your pants on, Killa. <img src=smilies/icon_smile.gif width=15 height=15 border=0 align=middle> It´s a good intro. <img src=smilies/icon_smile.gif width=15 height=15 border=0 align=middle>

neuromancer

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9

Monday, October 3rd 2005, 12:43pm

Mmm Mmm good. I´m intrigued. ´Turd-lickin´ dick´? That´s gold! And go easy on Wilde. He´s an honest critic. Edited by - neuromancer on 10/3/2005 1:50:04 PM
Signature from »neuromancer« ---"Smoke me a kipper, I`ll be back for breakfast."

chupa

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10

Monday, October 3rd 2005, 2:55pm

Not bad Killa. Maybe after you finish this one.... YOU CAN FINNISH YOUR OTHER FANFIC.... Ahem
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11

Monday, October 3rd 2005, 3:12pm

Chupa, he said he wasnot going to becuase he wrote himself into a corner, oh, and nice start, I like it =D Edited by - [GR_Fallen_Angel on 10/3/2005 2:14:04 PM
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Killa

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12

Monday, October 3rd 2005, 3:39pm

Aah yes, but remember guys, I did ask you to be brutally honest. And, I warn you now, Frank Johnson does have a pretty dirty mouth. There WILL be some language in this. And in case you haven´t guessed already, he is kind of a hillbilly. He is from Planet Houston in Texas and is kind of country. Well, let´s just say sort of a cowboy. He is a real smart ass (just like I am in real life) and he is a con-man. But, I´d better get back to work on chapter 1.
Signature from »Killa« __________________________ Okay, since someone who will remain nameless was offended by my last sentence, I`ve changed it. For those of you who just can`t wait, I`ve finally started a new fanfic, The Holocaust! __________________________ 4 8 15 16 23 42 Twenty bucks to whoever can tell me what the deal is with those numbers. I`ll give you a hint: They have somthing to do with a guy named Hurley. (Congrats to Taw, he was the first to get it right.)

neuromancer

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13

Monday, October 3rd 2005, 7:22pm

Sweet!! Redneck jokes in a Freelancer fanfic! Does it get any better than this?
Signature from »neuromancer« ---"Smoke me a kipper, I`ll be back for breakfast."

7

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14

Monday, October 3rd 2005, 9:46pm

looks good so far, i agree, it is some what choppy, otherwise tho... and on a different note... as I love jeff foxworthy, Yoy might be a redneck if you stick redneck jokes in a fan fic for a game set in space! does writing that make me a redneckm, corse i am one anyways so....... ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG :-D anywho If you only learn one thing in Freelancer, let it be this, do not piss off someone who is much better, or has a much higher level than you.
Signature from »7« If you only learn one thing in Freelancer, let it be this, do not piss off someone who is much better, or has a much higher level than you.

Killa

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15

Tuesday, October 4th 2005, 2:23pm

That IS NOT Jeff Foxworthy! I hate him so much! No, if I was to put any comedian in there it would be Dave Chappelle.
Signature from »Killa« __________________________ Okay, since someone who will remain nameless was offended by my last sentence, I`ve changed it. For those of you who just can`t wait, I`ve finally started a new fanfic, The Holocaust! __________________________ 4 8 15 16 23 42 Twenty bucks to whoever can tell me what the deal is with those numbers. I`ll give you a hint: They have somthing to do with a guy named Hurley. (Congrats to Taw, he was the first to get it right.)

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