the freelancer men are from mars woman are from somwhere else story

plasma cannons, a spare pair of underwear, dental floss and....

(time to join in <img src=smilies/icon_smile.gif width=15 height=15 border=0 align=middle>) a picture of Juni. It was the reason he brought spare pants <img src=smilies/icon_smile_wink.gif width=15 height=15 border=0 align=middle>. Dink also had a picture. He fondled his picture of Janet Reno and put it gently into his rucksack. And so they began their quest for the dragon. As they sailed across the 8th sea Jim realized that he´d forgotten to... edit-oops left my sig on Edited by - Sybot on 11-11-2003 22:47:16

..pack his Christian dior lipstick. oh pooh! now he´d have slum it at Superdrug getting Revlon! oh it just wasn´t fair, so he..

Chartered a pirate galleon, sailed to tortuga and pirated and pillaged....

programme interruption - (oh uv so been watching Pirates of the bl**dy Caribbean, haven´t u? <img src=smilies/icon_smile_big.gif width=15 height=15 border=0 align=middle> ah-arr u´ll be that young Ben then, arr!) programme resumes -

jim felt normal, after a breif interuption in service, he decided to raid a whipped cream factory, so that he could.... ooc: actually taw, i just saw matrix revolutions, and suddenly, i feel like a pirate Edited by - freighter fighter on 11-11-2003 23:52:44

...Dive into a huge vat of it, one of his life long dreams. Dink was simply happy with clapping it between his hands and watching it fly aroung like dish washing soap. The problem was, afterward, they smelled so vile thier crew mutnied and left them stranded on the island of...

Avalon where they met King Arthur. Life: No one gets out alive.

&quot;Great jumpin jahousifats!&quot; Exclaimed king arthur. &quot;You smell like whipped cream!&quot; The two explained how this had come to pass. When they got to the part about the mutiny, the king suddenly...

turned into Eric Idle from Monty Python and started singing the penis song. Life: No one gets out alive.

When all of a sudden, out of the sky falls.. <A href=´http://www.lancersreactor.org/t/forum/topic.asp?topic_id=25829&amp;forum_id=12&amp;Topic_Title=the+freelancer+men+are+from+mars+woman+are+from+somwhere+else+story&amp;forum_title=Off+Topic&amp;cat_title=&amp;M=False´ Target=_Blank> Men are from mars, women from somewhere else </a>

The entire court (including jim and dink) stood mouths agape staring at the pieces of shattered sky lying in pieces on the ground. Noone knew quite what to say, as this doesn´t happen often. Dink made the mistake of looking up, and the lack of sky caused a program fault and the matrix crashed!

waking Jim up once again to find that he was lying in first class on a British Airways plane with 7 empty shot glasses next to him. He remenbered that he was headed to..... &quot;On this ship you are to refer to me as Idiot, not you Captain. I mean... you know what I mean.&quot;

Irkust (sp?). He had bought the tickets in his drunken stupor. Strolling around in the cold russian air he suddenly noticed Dink standing around. He ran over to Dink and asked what he was doing here. &quot;I´m preparing for the invasion of Irkust from Kamchatka&quot; Dink replied &quot;Janet must be freed!!&quot; Looking around Jim saw 3 red men walk over the line on the ground and start pokeing 2 green men with their sticks. Suddenly a enormus blue dice fell from the heavens and crushed the reds. Jim, having seen enough strange things in his time decided to think nothing of it and set about walking back to civilisation. Suddenly he was set upon by...

... a nomadic tribe of ficious barbarians known as &quot;the Jun-Horde.&quot; He helplessly watches as his family and fellow villagers are savagely slain by the evil warriors. And as the leader was charging him down, Jim looks at him. The leaders mace was on its way to meet Jim´s face when... &quot;On this ship you are to refer to me as Idiot, not you Captain. I mean... you know what I mean.&quot;

...a star in a galaxy far far away went supernova. This great release of energy opened a wormhole intowich a planetary fragment the size of a small elephant drifted. This in turn was deposited in our own earth´s atmosohere directly above Dink with a startling &quot;wheeg&quot; type noise. All turned to look and Jim slipped on a banana peel in doing so, falling flat on his face. The mace missed him by a mile. Dink was now standing under a rather large rock wich fell directly onto his head. Fortunately...

The fragment was from the planet Polystyrene 5, so i just bounced around harmlessy, after squashing several buildings and people, jim took this as a sign, so he... <A href=´http://www.lancersreactor.org/t/forum/topic.asp?topic_id=25829&amp;forum_id=12&amp;Topic_Title=the+freelancer+men+are+from+mars+woman+are+from+somwhere+else+story&amp;forum_title=Off+Topic&amp;cat_title=&amp;M=False´ Target=_Blank> Men are from mars, women from somewhere else </a>

raised his hands to the sky and praised the lord! Unfortunately the lord was feeling bored so he struck Jim down with a thunderbolt. Jim stared at his own dead body. Then Dink walked over and started weeping over it. &quot;Hey dink over here&quot; shouted Jim. &quot;Oh&quot; said Dink. He stood up and came to Jim. As they stared at the mysterious dead doppleganger...

he started reciting shakesepare so dink.... <A href=´http://www.lancersreactor.org/t/forum/topic.asp?topic_id=25829&amp;forum_id=12&amp;Topic_Title=the+freelancer+men+are+from+mars+woman+are+from+somwhere+else+story&amp;forum_title=Off+Topic&amp;cat_title=&amp;M=False´ Target=_Blank> Men are from mars, women from somewhere else </a>

Began acting out parts to Jim´s dialogue. Soon they drew a large crowd and eventualy opened a theater. All was going swimmingly and they both became quite rich. One fatefull day, during a performance of &quot;Zlothelo&quot; by William Spectrespere (<img src=smilies/icon_smile_big.gif width=15 height=15 border=0 align=middle>) Janet Reno (who was still hunting poor Jim) stood up in the audiance and said...